January 15th 2012 = P.F. Changs Rock and Roll Arizona Half Marathon.
I had been apprehensive about the half marathon for months. Why? Because I could never really make myself train. It was just too boring to run that long, and I rarely ever felt good while doing it. So I didn't train much. When I say I didn't "train much," I mean that I ran 2-3 miles maybe a few times a week, and about 3 months out from the Half I ran 5 miles, and on the Tuesday of the week of the Half (on Sunday), I ran my lifetime personal record of distance at 6 miles.
Sooo how did the Half marathon go?
Well, I just accepted the fact that I would participate in the event no matter what. Even if I had to walk, even if WORSE CASE SCENARIO: the "Slag" Wagon had to pick me up and drive me further ahead in the race because I was too slow. And that is absolutely, without a doubt, the WORST case scenario. How humiliating would that be? From D1 collegiate athlete to "slag" wagon. Even if no one ever knew about my hypothetical secret ride, and I took it to the grave, I would still know. And that is enough.
Sooo how did the Half marathon go?
Incredibly difficult.
I haven't had to exhibit that kind of mental toughness since collegiate soccer (although it really wasn't mental toughness: see below), maybe since that one time in college (I remember the year, it was the beginning of 2007) when Shayne McKenzie, aka most beast-like woman strength and conditioning coach of all time...so awesome and "no-nonsense" that they actually had her (a woman) coach the MEN'S BASEBALL team...which is exceptionally impressive, made us run the "Tour de Worthen." Lets just say it involved several thousands of steps in Ball State's Basketball arena AFTER a workout of running stairs. Let's just say only half of us finished it. Side note on Shayne MacKenzie (who, by the way, is 6'2'' and stares down at you after you ask a question as if you are the most unintelligent human being whose question will not even be dignified with a response. I actually found this to be hilarious)...I think we started off on the wrong foot when we first met and I assumed her name was McKenzie Shayne because she was a girl. Never assume...NEVER.
Back to the half.
Official start time was 7:30am. It was pitch black when we arrived, and I saw so many legit runners as I walked passed the start line to my corral (way, way back there), and I started to think I was in over my head. By the time I got around the runners/joggers/walkers in my corral (which ended up being way too slow for me...could that really happen???) I felt much better. Less serious runners, more casual approaches.
Slowly the corrals were released at the starting line. I didn't start the race until after 8am (I think.) Much to my surprise, I felt good while running. It was actually fun running with thousands of people. I was in a constant crowd of people. I was passing and getting passed. I ran with a girl about my age from miles 4-7. I literally was right next to her side. I didn't even try to hide it. Maybe she was doing the same thing. All I know is: I was cruising.
Until about mile 8. Then I just felt terrible. Everything started catching up to me. Most of all, I was in pain, not soreness, but pain from having my feet and legs hit the ground so many times. Like bruising. And I wasn't moving that fast, so I could feel myself stiffening up. All this at about the time we were running through Papago park. Those are little mountains. And the park is very hilly. We were on a steady incline until like mile 11. Then the decline didn't even feel like we were going downhill.
I wanted to cry. And I wanted to stop. I took a few steps at a water station so I could drink my water without it going all over my face. The few steps walking was even worse. Because I still hurt, but I was just prolonging the pain by taking longer to get to the finish line. And I still got water all over my face. And gatorade.
By the grace of God, I finished the half marathon, running the whole thing, in 2 hours and 30 minutes. I ran slow, but I ran it.
It was a spiritual battle, for sure. I feel like in those long hours of solitude running, the enemy can prey on us. Does prey on us, for sure. And I knew I couldn't run 13.1 miles just because I have a superfit human body, because I don't. And I knew I couldn't run 13.1 miles because I am incredibly mentally tough, because I'm not. It was only because the Lord gave me grace to finish that I was able to run it all.
Reminded me of the S.P.E.C.I.A.L. at Ultimate Training Camp in 2008 where I met Chase. Although 16 hours of competition is still the most broken down physically I've ever been. And praise God for it! The lord meets us in our weakness, for which I am beyond grateful because I know that, compared to the Lord, I am beyond weak.
