a DIASTER travel story but AWESOME Indiana Christmas

We had a fantastic Christmas this year! Chase and I flew to Indiana to spend it with my family for the first time in 3 years after having spent the last two in Vegas with Chase's relatives (I worked last Christmas Day and Vegas was drive-able from Phoenix, sadly not really from the bay area).

Christmas Eve

Christmas Eve service at College Park Church - over 20 Murphy's got to hear the Gospel!

We had a terrible time getting to Indy from San Jose though. Let me tell you about it.

We arrived at the San Jose airport on Dec. 20th having already known our 2pm flight from San Jose to Vegas (our connection) was delayed until 4:15pm due to a mechanical issue. We were going to miss our connection by 15 min. Do we take the chance? It's a little too risky for us. "Ok, so what's the next flight to Indy from Vegas?" we asked. 

Southwest gate agent: "All the flights from Vegas to Indy are booked until Dec. 24th."

What?? Christmas Eve? All because we are missing our flight because of a mechanical issue with YOUR plane?? That's what we thought in our heads...and I may have voiced. We asked if they could get us to any city within 4 hours of Indianapolis. "Well, we can get you to St. Louis on the 23rd."

By the sheer grace of God, Southwest just happened to add a flight from Vegas to Chicago as we were speaking to the gate agent. Like they JUST added it on while we were speaking with her. I know this because several people in front of us were looking to go to Chicago and there was nothing Southwest had available. The executives must have just gotten together to authorize an added on flight to Chicago that didn't exist seconds before, and there were like 8 seats available for our gate agents to access. Thank you JESUS! Prior to this, I. was. so. upset. I hadn't seen my family for Christmas for a few years partly because I'm a registered nurse and people get hurt and sick on holidays and need us to take care of them, which I happily do. But it doesn't go without consequences that are really tough - like being the only one from my large family missing for Christmas every year.

So we are re-booked on the flight from Vegas to Chicago. We arrived in Vegas with theoretically enough time to make our original flight from Vegas to Indy, if our plane hadn't been sitting on the runway for 20 minutes waiting for a gate to open up.

Fast forward a few hours and we are in Chicago at 1am (2am Indy time, 11pm CA time). We decided earlier to just go ahead and rent a car and drive through the night to Zionsville (where my parents live). 

Lets just say because of the severe weather and all the accident on I-65 what should have been a sub 3 hour drive turned into a 7 hour drive. One of the accidents had us sitting on the interstate without moving an inch for three hours. We decided it would be safest for me to drive the entire time because I know how to drive in snow, wind, ice, etc. and it's very specific. Thank goodness I brought my kindle and had the most fantastic book series to read (Mark of the Lion series...everyone will benefit from reading literally the best fictional trilogy of all mankind).

We arrived in Indy at 9am EST.  I was borderline breakdown.

But the fantastic Christmas we had with all my dad's brothers and their families in town more than made up for it. Let's just say it was lots of delicious homemade food and plenty of fine wine, like the really, really good stuff.

About left: Cousin Kelly Ruth, Grandma Jean, cousin Brian and his wife Megan, my mom, my sister's husband Spencer, and my brother Patrick. Middle right: Uncle Don and my dad, identical twins. Below left: More shots of family during prayer time before meal. Below right: the deliciously fine wine of which I spoke of earlier.

My handsome husband being the odd man
out and asking for "white wine."

Get it?? My married last name + our maiden name + my sister's married name (Irwin)??

My favorite part was opening up presents Christmas morning with just my immediate family. Because it was such great quality time and we all genuinely enjoy giving gifts to each other. My sister got my mom this really special coffee mug with a picture of her and my late Grandma Jackson on it. (She passed away this past May, you can read about the wonderful person she was here). My oldest brother Sean was so lively and hilarious the whole time and (as I was his "secret person" this year) got me the greatest thing ever - a dutch oven (which I just used to cook my first pot roast). My sister also makes these awesome calendars for my parents every year that they display in the kitchen. Above every month has pictures of the family. This year, rather than having the cover say "The Murphys," she did something a little more creative now that Stephanie and I no longer carry the Murphy name. I'll let you take a look below!

My parents beautiful tree in the sunroom!

My sister and her husband, Spencer.

Left: Little peachy (the youngest of the 5) Right: Old Seanson (the oldest of the 5)

The traditional "Murphy kids Stair Picture" on Christmas morning. We have expanded to include
 our spouses. This would not be complete if Sean (hidding in the back) didn't absolutely look
 bored to death every year this picture is taken.

Before we left - Chase and I had our own little Christmas. We exchanged gifts and opened the ones his parent's sent us. Every year we read the story of Christ's birth from the gospel of Luke. It was really special for us.

Chase reading the gospel of Luke at the tree

Our little living room decorated for our Christmas together in San Jose. Lots of candlelight!

Christmas tree hunting

The Saturday after Thanksgiving, Chase and I went looking for an authentic California Christmas tree. There are a ton of Christmas tree farms in California. Actually, I can't think of many things that can't be grown in CA with the beautiful and temperament weather year round. We traveled about 20 min south, in between San Jose and Santa Cruz to a farm we found online. As we were driving on this narrow road up the beautiful hills of northern California, we passed so many beautiful trees and even a vineyard. It was so nice!

We found the farm we were looking for and parked. This was obviously a small family-run business that had been growing these Christmas trees for years. A hand-painted sign told us that the trees cost $50, plus $3 for the netting...great, we only basically only carry cards these days (at least I do)! Luckily, Chase opened his wallet and found exactly $53 (how does that even happen?!)

Chase walked up to the one guy pointing people around, and asked him how things work. You should have seen Chase's face when the guy told him to grab a saw, find a tree, cut it down, and carry up front to get netted! But to Chase's credit, he grabbed that saw like a lumberjack and started off towards the trees!

         Finally we found a great tree, well, not really, but we liked the top half of the tree. We cut it down thinking it might not be as big as we wanted...then realized it was like 8ft tall, and fits in our apartment by a foot. All in all - we did something new and had fun with it! Had no idea people in CA get to cut down their own trees! Well,  we wouldn't know how AZ did it, the last two years we bought our trees at Lowe's...shh :)

Yes, Chase had to hold the tree while we drove. We did a good job at tying it on the top, but it shifted with the drive. It was never in any real danger...but I'm always one for a good photo op :)

The finished product

Oh yea- here's a video on me attempting to saw this thing down. Let's be real...this is a job for the husband.

a few pics of the apartment

For mostly my family, so they can see what our place looks like!

Main room 

View of main room when we walk in...not a very good pic due to the massive amount of light coming in from the windows!

View from back in the kitchen

Dining area + computer space + gallery wall

My gallery wall at night

View looking into kitchen from living room window

Our mini hallway and bookshelf. Bedroom right, bathroom left

Bedroom...need to finish my 3rd chevron piece so we can hang them..guhh

Bathroom across from bedroom.

End of tour! We have washer and dryer, they are in 2 double doors on the left as we walk in the door. Also there is some small storage we keep our christmas decorations, snowboarding gear, etc.

So now my parents know what our place looks like!

Home

Sometimes all it takes is a sunset, you know, to spark a memory.

Something to remind me of our "old home." Arizona. Phoenix, well, Scottsdale specifically. Where we embarked on the adventure of our marriage. Where we became family. The first place we called home.

Arizona is infamous for the most timeless and wonderful sunsets. I have pictures of several...but the one that sticks out the most, in my memory, was the last one I ever saw. June 29th 2012...as we were leaving Arizona, on our way to California. Who knows if we'll ever return.

Did I tell you I hated Arizona when I first arrived? My first memory of Phoenix was driving down the 17 in our unconditioned Budget truck. It was miserable as we went from temperament Flagstaff to sweltering Phoenix. I hated all the brown. Dead desert. Ugly. I yearned so deeply for the lush green that was Indiana. My home for all my life.

Funny how I came to love Arizona so dearly. Maybe because it was my first "home" outside of Indiana. It was a life Chase and I had created for ourselves, and we were self-sustainable (barely, in the beginning.) It's where we learned to leave and cleave to one another, where we learned to grow together. It's almost like we grew into adults together. I watched Chase grow from a college student to a husband who took command of the bills and made decisions worthy of any seasoned adult.

It's funny how a new foreign city can become your home. I'll remind myself of that if I ever get a little blue out in California.

Home is wherever Chase is :)

About Kirk.

Yesterday we received the full autopsy and toxicology report of Kirk's death. After the autopsy, we only knew that Kirk had some "heart changes" and that we were awaiting 4-6 weeks for the toxicology report to know the full story. Stories had surfaced that 911 was called about a "very drunk" person at the bar.

These reports were false. And frustrating.

Whereas Kirk was definitely losing consciousness in the bar, it was not due to alcohol (thanks for the inaccurate account, Sports Illustrated.) His BAC wasn't that high. It wasn't due to drugs either, unless you count tylenol, which he possibly took earlier in the day because he didn't feel so hot.

Kirk died due to a congenital heart defect called arrthymogenic right ventricular cardiomyopathy. He had a diseased heart. He had no idea.

Chase and I have heard accounts from friends that he wasn't feeling well earlier that day. This would make sense with the pathophysiology of this disease process. His heart was probably in and out of arrhythmias because his heart (namely his right ventricle) was on it's last string, and his cardiac output was low, so he wasn't getting as much oxygen to his vitals organs.

It's hard that no one called 911 until he was in full arrest. And it's probably because the bar employee that dragged him out assumed he was just drunk. But even if he was that drunk, 911 still should have been called immediately. We struggle with that fact. And I know his parents do too. We all like to think that if we had been there, the outcome would have been different.

But we weren't. And it wasn't.

We are thankful for the closure in knowing how Kirk died. We know it was natural. We are thankful that it was organic and not from one bad decision.

We have peace knowing that the Lord ordained all his days. But it still hurts. We still think about the "what ifs" and "how comes." And we still miss that handsome smile. With God's grace, slowly we will stop thinking about the "what ifs" and the "how comes."

But I think we will always miss that handsome smile:)

Little update on the Macs

As we are still adjusting to life in California, I just wanted to give a little update!

I have started a travel nursing position with Stanford on the Neurosurgery Unit, which means I have a 3 month contract with them. I'm pretty pumped to be able to get in at Stanford to see what it's all about without making a long term commitment yet. So far (just two days of orientation), I am in love! I think my unit is going to be fun and challenging. It is a higher acuity neurosurgery floor that includes a six bed progressive care unit. My first day on the floor is this Tuesday. Let the good times roll!

Chase and I have found a home church called Garden City Church. The pastor, Justin, just concluded a six week sermon series through the book of Jonah. It was life-changing stuff. Just absolutely unreal. Really encouraged us to take a good hard look at ourselves and our mission. We found a neighborhood group through this church and we meet with them every Tuesday. Great people, really honest, and we get to share a lot of laughs (and some tears.)

Chase continues to get a lot of great feedback from the guys who work for him. We are so grateful for their favor towards Chase. He works his butt off at work and tries to maintain a joyful attitude, which, as we ALL know, this can be super difficult with any job. He really loves his guys.

We continue to grieve Kirk's death. We think about him and his family every day. Several times a day. Our hearts ache for their loss, and for the heavy burden they carry, and for the intense loneliness we know they feel. We pray for their comfort and peace. We acknowledge that they will never get over the loss of their son, but with God's grace and provision, they will get through one day at a time. Please lift them up in prayer with us. Their names are Michael, Sandy, and his brother Kyle.

blindly navigating through bereavement

Tomorrow we travel to Chicago for the funeral services of Chase's dear friend, Kirk Urso.  How heartbreaking and devastating to bury a young friend. Twenty Two. Why we got to see our 23rd, 24th, 25th birthdays and Kirk did not, we'll never know. Profound sadness seeps into the deepest marrow of our bones.

Chase has the richest memories of Kirk. The ones with deep joy. The late night talks about life, faith, the future, the past. The hard moments where sin was confessed and sanctification prayed for. The fun moments when Kirk taught Chase to kick a soccer ball, and Chase helped Kirk with his golf game, and together when they dominated in pick-up basketball. The hilarious moments when Kirk used his faux British accent to whisper-narrate Chase's golf tournament in a homemade video as he and Daniel walked with Chase between holes.

Kirk stood by Chase's side when he promised his life and himself to me. And at the reception, Kirk was on the dance floor, celebrating all night.

You can google Kirk and see his public achievements.  But, oh, was he so much more. 

Chase has said the closest fellowship he's ever had was when he lived at 1111 Franklin Street at UNC with Kirk and the boys. He will be reunited with the latter, together for the first time since our wedding as they say goodbye to their brother.

We will keep you in our hearts forever, Kirk.

"In this world, you will have trouble,

But take heart! I have overcome the world." 

John 16:33